Nude Nuns With Big Guns

Could be one of my all time Netflix favorites. Watched it last night.

Plenty of folks blown away (mostly head shots), rape, forced drug use, prostitution, lesbian nun sex and more bare breasts than a freezer full of turkeys before Thanksgiving.

Turns out the Catholic Church was into drug distribution (I’m sure the Pontiff was totally unaware) and was forcing the nuns to cut the drugs. Of course they were bare-breasted – hence the first part of the title of the movie – but still wearing their habits out of respect for their calling.

Eventually, Sister Sarah revolts against the abuse and corruption and turns rogue, taking revenge on one and all with her big guns. Hence the second part of the title.

Spoiler alert: In the final scene, Sister Sarah’s lesbian lover pulls a Lorena Bobbit with a well aimed pistol shot instead of a knife. Has Chavo (the villain) screaming in agony (regretting his choice of profession, I’m sure) while holding his severed johnson.

I give it four and a half Moon Pies out of five for its debauchery and degradation of social values.


After viewing this flick, I was taken to memories of my childhood schooling at St. John Cantius Elementary in Cleveland. Not that I witnessed any bare-breasted nuns but it had me picturing the ones by which I was taught – especially Sisters Theoniel and Edwards (third and eight grade respectively) – in the same light as portrayed on the screen. Made me want to pop a beer or two. Nightmare!

Then there was this:

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