Meijer Classic – Saturday

July 25, 2015

Looping for Wendy Doolan.

Add two more to our total on Friday. No weekend play again.

The plan was for twosomes off the first tee but a prediction of early rain changed that to a later start and split tees. The rain never happened.

As I stated previously, there isn’t a room to be had in Grand Rapids this weekend. One caddie who made the cut had to travel 60 miles to Lansing for a place.

The cabinet under my sink at the Motel 6 does not allow any foot room making one bend more than usual to use the sink. While brushing my teeth on Monday, I felt a pain in my back which progressively worsened each day. The last two rounds I couldn’t bend even to tie my shoes but by judicially placing the bag upright or using my upper body to lift it, I managed to complete my duties, albeit slowly. After work, I had to use both hand rails at the 6 just to pull myself up the stairs.

Today I wake up to find the pain totally gone. Like it was just a bad dream. Go figure. TMS I’m sure.

Necessity truly is the mother of invention. Right after lunch my car started acting up again. Sputtering then stalling and the tweaking of the wires leading to the fuel pump cut-off switch only kept it going for a short time barely getting me back to the motel.

I then get a call from Jane Crafter asking if I would help doing yardage for TV. I agreed but my car seemed to have finally given up the ghost. No amount of wire-fiddling would get it started so I decided to go deep. Off came the back panel and I pulled the side one down as far as it would go. Bingo! There it was. A loose mounting bolt that secured the ground wire. A little tightening and all was right with the world once more. Good for another 190K miles.

The ride back to the caddie lot was one of the more colorful I have experienced and one our driver will not likely forget. Most of conversation I cannot repeat but we did learn that one of our most notable loopers got his butt reamed no less than four times from his player during today’s round without a peep of response.

There’s a cheerleaders of all ages competition in town and some are staying at my motel. Three little girls, dressed ready to contend, came to the lobby this morning asking if there was a place to perform a few cartwheels for a warm-up. The front desk clerk directed then to the conference room which was just feet away. It was to their liking so they all went in but the first one to perform must have misjudge the distance and slammed her foot into the wall. Luckily, no broken toes. That would have cost the motel a few bucks if she did. What an idiot to give them permission.

There are so many players signed-up for 1st stage Q-School that many have been given a pass to 2nd stage based on their Symetra Tour eligibility. I was planning on going but my player was one of the lucky ones.

Then there was this:

LPGA gives no explanation for cancellation of China event – Maybe their stock market is a clue.

Then again. LPGA event in China postponed due to ‘date conflict’

Allenby fires caddie mid-round after row – Heard Allenby is a real dick.

Norwegian golf course plagued by serial pooper“And we know it is a man because the poos are too massive to be from a woman,” – They haven’t seen the women in Mississippi.

Is this kid from India the next Tiger Woods?


The hidden danger inside your golf cart

Urine resistant walls in San Francisco shoot pee back – You think San Francisco would be a sanctuary city for public urinators.

Meijer Classic Tuesday

July 21, 2015

Looping for Wendy Doolan.

We teed off with Monday qualifier Kelli Pry then caught up to Birdie Kim on four and made it a threesome.

Birdie had a virgin looper on the bag who even had to be shown how to carry the bag. His name was Alex. A tall, lanky, hatless ginger, donned in dark rimmed glasses, peach shorts and a blue and white Purina checkerboard long-sleeved shirt scrunched up his forearms as far as they would go. He was on a one day trial (that sounds familiar) but as soon as I laid eyes on him, the movie Caddy Shack came to mind. He would been a perfect fit toting a sack at Bushwood Country Club.

We played through ten then cut over to seventeen. A player meeting at five and general slow play made it a good move.

A looper getting injured can put him on the sideline in short order but when it happens checking-in to the hotel, it literately adds insult to injury. One of the guys lost his balance on the stairs and took a tumble breaking his wrist yesterday.

I hear the Symetra Tour will be utilizing the reflectors during practice as they do out here. Very good move.

Meijer Monday

July 20, 2015

Looping for Wendy Doolan.

First on the tee and touched them all in time to watch The Open Championship.

Walked sixteen holes yesterday until I came upon club play. The nines are switched (but nine and eighteen stay the same) from how the members play them and compare like night and day. The front nine is tighter with much more elevation and the back more open.

Nine and eighteen must have confused our yardage book maker (Troy Martin of Bucketboy Graphics). He has the same page for both holes. I had to re-shoot eighteen and redraw the green.

FYI: I worked for Wendy at Q-School back in 1995. We went into a three hole aggregate playoff then into a sudden death playoff with Tina Tombs and “Doofus” on the bag. Tina approach went long and followed with a poor chip. A missed putt for par and that’s all she wrote.

For those players who just got in and caddies who delayed pulling the trigger early, rooms are non-existent for the entire week due to the Meijer LPGA Community Concert featuring OneRepublic and the Grand Rapids Balloon Festival on the weekend. There are other events planned which added to the unavailability.

I’m at the Motel 6. The A/C is weak and the Internet very slow but I do have a HD TV so I can plug in my computer. Can’t complain too much. I have a room. Update: No Internet at all today. Complained at the front desk and got this response. “Well I have it on my iPad”.


After the shift change I tried again. They were on the phone with the provider trying to fix it. In minutes it was working. In the mean time, I used my phone as a hotspot. Worked perfectly.

Marathon Classic – Round Two Completion

July 18, 2015

Looping for Wendy Doolan.

It was a bust. No weekend play for us.

Another storm and another delay.

The final five British Open spots were filled after the completion of the second round.

british open qualifiers

Chipotle burritos that would choke a small horse were for lunch in the caddie area today. I dined with three other loopers who failed to make the cut. The rest partook during the rain delay I assume.

Jeff Steffler worked for a young Korean player – who’s’ nickname is “Five”-  at the 3rd Stage Q-School last year and even thought she didn’t make it, gave him high praise when finished.

“You’re the best caddie I ever had.” she said

“Who was your previous caddie?” Jeff asked.

“My mom.” she answered.

Maybe it wasn’t as high as I thought.

What did the psychologist say to the naked man? “I can clearly see your nuts”. – Jeff Steffler

Over $3000 was raised for the Danielle Downey memorial scholarship fund through the sales of yardage books provided by Rick Kropf. He donated all his time and expense for charity. Bravo!

Then there was this:

Calif. to Mt. Rushmore, in a golf cart

Marathon Classic – Round Two

July 17, 2015

I’m looping for Wendy Doolan.

Just like the Open Championship at St. Andrews, rain delayed the start of the round. Ours was two and a half hours.

Walking down the ninth fairway (our final hole) we were minutes of putting this round in the books when the horn blew signaling dangerous conditions. A storm was in the vicinity and it was the prudent thing to do but at least we know where we stand.

130 yards to the pin and a shot off the cut. It’s birdie or bust tomorrow.

Play resumes at 7:30.

The food in the caddie area arrived as promised (starting Thursday). We had Chinese for lunch supplied by Magic Wok and pizza when we finished.

The LPGA has become the “no fun tour”. I’ve heard this more than once from some of the old guard caddies. Since it’s my first week back in three years, I haven’t experienced the changes that make it so but from what they describe, I can see their point.

“Coffee Joe” was in the house yesterday just to visit. Along with all the other familiar faces I’ve come across this week, it has been a memorable reunion. The only thing that would have made it better is if we were at the Corning Classic hanging out in the caddie shack.

Then there was this:

Japan has finally figured out what to do with its abandoned golf courses

Golf Channel’s Oberholser On Tiger Woods: ‘I Think His Best Days Are Long Behind Him

Marathon Classic – Round One

July 16, 2015

Looping for Wendy Doolan.

The knees buckled on the first tee but after the calm set in, Wendy finished with a one under par round. Not bad after a three year hiatus.

Heard some grumbling regarding the food in player hospitality and the caddie area. Not the best this week.

Wicked weather expected at St. Andrews tomorrow. Should be fun to watch.

I’ve been looking for a simple pair of slippers forever. The ones at Walmart suck and anything online are too expensive. Then I walked over to Bed Bath and Beyond and found these. Just what I needed and half price to boot. I am a native Ohioan so there was a bit of trepidation buying slippers with the Michigan logo but I pulled the trigger regardless. May the ghost of Woody Hayes forgive me. Shoot, I never liked his style of football anyway.

Michigan slippers

Then there was this:

Lorie Kane would prefer not to be playing solo at Pan Am Games

Why Laura Davies Induction Fiasco Points To Deeper Problems In Golf –

Phil Mickelson called ‘sour grapes’ in golf feud that won’t die

Toledo Wednesday – Marathon Classic

July 15, 2015

Put in a good day’s practice. Should be ready to go for our 7:48 time tomorrow.

I mentioned the reflectors at the front of every green during the practice round of which remained in place today. That was initiated by The PGA of America during the KPMG Championship. It was suggested to the LPGA and they adopted the practice. Bully for them!

I was in the caddie area this morning awaiting Wendy’s arrival when I overheard a looper, whom of which I was unfamiliar, lamenting the lack of his player’s chipping prowess. He implied that if she could only chip like us (men), she would pocket an extra $100K a year.

Rooting for A. J. Eathorne this week. She just got in the field replacing Reilley Rankin who was the next alternate.

In honor of all the Indian run motels I have stayed at lately, I changed the Google Now voice on my phone to English (India). She seems very polite and her pronunciation is impeccable.

Toledo Tuesday – Marathon Classic

July 14, 2015

Looping for Wendy Doolan this week.

Played 22 holes before rain (a recurring theme) put an end to our third nine.

There was a reflector on every hole indicating the front of the green. This is where the depth of the pin will be measured. Makes is easy to check the course while playing.

A morning and afternoon shotgun pro-am yesterday tied up the course all day. We practiced putting and chipping then the rain hit. I came back and walked the front nine later in the evening.

There are a few changes since I saw it last. They lengthened number three to the back of the tee; number five to a new tee far left making the hole not as severe of a dogleg right but longer; the par three eighth was lengthened; there are now two tees for number nine. The forward tee is only 240 to the front of the green making it a drivable par four.

Brooke Henderson to play at Brook-Lea Symetra event.

Here’s why.

Marathon qualifier

Then there was this:

Donald Trump writes LPGA’s Whan with offer to move Women’s British Open

Vadala determined to save women’s pro golf in Rochester

Trump International Golf Club Files for Bankruptcy Protection

LPGA, caddie Paul Fusco speak out after U.S. Women’s Open incident

Champions Monday

March 28, 2011

A visit to the PO, barber, grocery and thrift store (to drop of a few things not buy) was all she wrote for today.

DIY: Nail – I mean Dale – has had an ongoing problem with the driver’s side power window on his Explorer. It was working intermittently for awhile and now was stuck in the down position for a few days. The original diagnosis was to replace the control box at a cost of a few hundred bucks. Within minutes of searching the Net, I found folks with similar dilemmas. Seemed the most probable solution was to replace the relay switch under the dash. I passed along the info and Dale gave it a go himself. $22 (for the part) later it was fixed. Always get a second opinion of doctors, lawyers and mechanics or just call me. I’ll look it up.

LPGA stuff:

PGA and LPGA Professionals offer free golf club fittings in April“…I can assure you that anyone who is custom fit into the right clubs will see an immediate improvement in their game." – BULL! How to you fit clubs to a chop? Start with some lessons then fit them with some sticks.

Sybase Match Play Championship Announces Free Ticket Promotion – One way to put asses in the seats. I’m all for it. Get the fans involved as much as you can.

Golf Channel to air exclusive coverage of the Kraft Nabisco Championship – Do they have live Internet streaming?

Willingness to learn is universal language among LPGA Tour players – Now, if they could only play by the same rule book. BADDA–BING!

Best’s Golf Guide to Mexico names Lorena Ochoa Person of the Year – Queen Lorena rules!

Then there was this:

Doctors Warn About ‘Facebook Depression’ In Teens – What doesn’t depress folks these days? Must be true. Billions are spent on antidepressants each year.

Mississippi Justice: Dog defecating in yard leads to shooting

Chavez urges Venezuelans to cut calorie intake ‘Last year, Gustavo Rojas, who ran as an alternate for the National Assembly in Sept. 26 elections, held a raffle to raise cash for his campaign. The grand prize: breast implants’ – Doesn’t relate to the headline but it was part of the story. Thought it would get your attention.

WTF! You have to see this video. The pool is only a foot deep!

Bell Micro Classic – Round Three

May 15, 2010

My Player is Jill Mcgill

Three over today. Nothing to lose tomorrow. Go for it Jill!

Lessons needed: Combine a bunch of newbie loopers and bunkers full of  loosely compacted sand and what do you get? Some real sorry-ass rake jobs that’s what! The toothed side of the rake is not always the best option in these conditions. Looks like someone’s been plowin’ the back forty out here. Their eyesight may be failing also. Not even getting all the footprints. Found a rake placed in a bunker. That’s a no-no. It’s the player’s responsibility so, at a minimum, a notice should be posted reminding them to keep an eye on their cadero.

One for the WTF files: Mark “Greenvan” (used to drive a green van) went out before his round yesterday to check some pin placements. Upon arriving on the sixth hole, he observed Janice Moodie returning to the tee box to replay her shot after taking an unplayable. He decided to follow the group to the green where the strangest thing happened. Janice was last to putt and her looper, Jerry “The Visor” (I think you can figure that one out), took he ball, cleaned it, then walked over to Mark and gave it to him. Not thinking, Mark pocketed the pellet and continued watching. When Janice asked for the ball, “The Visor” reached into the bag , brought out a substitute and gave it to her. Another looper in the group came up to Mark and asked if that was the ball in play. Jerry either overheard the question or realized his doofus error and stopped Janice in the nick of time. He retrieved the original ball and she finished out with it. May be time to ditch the visor and and get a hat. That sun can be brutal!

D’DOH! Rice disqualified from tournament … his caddie used a range-finding scope …

Git-r-done! Split tees are the order of the day tomorrow. Foul weather on the horizon. Some players and caddies have to get to US Open qualifier on Monday. Oh, oh.

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